True Story Lyrics - Bobby Bare

This mornin' I jumped on my horse and went out for a ride 

Some wild outlaws chased me and they shot me in the side 

So I crawled into a wild cat's cave to find a place to hide 

But some pirates found me a sleepin' there and soon they had me tied 

Till a lady zombie cut me loose and begged to be my bride 

So I said I'd come back Wednesday but I must admit I lied 

Cause I run away into the swamp but I forgot my guide 

And I stepped into some quicksand and no matter how I tried 

I couldn't get out until I met a crocodile named Clyde 

Who took me to some cannibals who planned to have me fried 

They built a fire under me and I swear I almost cried 

Till an eagle come and swooped me up and through the air we flied 

But he dropped me in a boilin' lake a thousand miles wide 

And you know what happened then I died