Hillbilly Honeymoon Lyrics - Cledus T. Judd

Been together four years and had five kids 

So we did the right thing and finally got hitched 

We tracked down the preacher after altar call 

And proceeded to the VFW Hall 

When he said, Cledus T. did you take Debra Liz 

I stuttered, I do, knowin' I done did 

The wedding cake was, 'Moon Pie', stacked three tiers 

And the punch bowl flowed with Falstaff Beer 

Now that's about as swanky as this town gets 

For they throw rice, heck, they threw grits 

No stretch limousine, just a full sized van 

But at least we was headed for the promised land 

On our hillbilly honeymoon 

No champagne Caviar or Cordon Bleu 

A can of Vienna Sausage and a Mountain Dew 

And soda pop too 

On our hillbilly honeymoon 

Spent all our money on pay per view 

Didn't need Playboy to get in the mood 

Just a roller derby wrestlin' and a Rambo II 

And III and IV, I was up in the room 

On our hillbilly honeymoon 

Well, after a while things simmered down 

So we got dressed up for a night on the town 

There ain't nothing too good for my sweetheart 

Took a romantic stroll through the Super WalMart 

We got back wanting some fine cuisine 

We bought out the whole dern vending machine 

On our hillbilly honeymoon 

No dainty little plates of finger foods 

Just M&M's Snickers and tomato juice 

And Cheez Wiz too 

On our hillbilly honeymoon 

I spent half our savings on the hardware aisle 

She spent the rest on the latest styles 

A thong underwear that drove me wild 

Back in the room, I tried them on too 

On our hillbilly honeymoon 

Well, it's been three years, got four more young'uns 

Ain't a lot of time for much kissin' and a huggin' 

For the last eight weeks I've slept on the couch 

Think it's about time we renewed our vows 

And took another hillbilly honeymoon 

No [Incomprehensible] egg nog, just barbecue 

And a box of wine will be nice down too 

Won't need a corkscrew, yeah 

On our hillbilly honeymoon 

We can raid little Tommy's piggy bank 

Scrape up a hundred dollars worth in change 

Just enough for a night at the bowling lanes 

And some new perfume, cheap motel room 

On our hillbilly honeymoon 

[Incomprehensible]