A Housewife's Revenge Lyrics - Jewel

Seems like that man took my heart 

[feels] 

Laid it neatly out before him on the floor 

Then he put on the biggest 

Heaviest winter boots he had 

And stomped on it for three hours, 

Maybe four 

And I hope his sorrells are ruined forever 

Cause you know he knows how to push my every button 

Get down to my last nerve 

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Like the other day he forgot to put his beer can 

In the recycling bin 

And he meant to do it on purpose I'm sure 

So I might just have to tell him 

Why his dog, ralph, that ran away three years ago 

Won't be coming home again 

Cause you know he walks around the house 

In his underwear 

Whenever my girlfriends come around 

And perhaps if he were good looking 

I might feel a bit jealous, overzealous 

But all I feel is embarrassed 

Looking at him standing there 

And I hope he never finds his left slipper 

And my psychiatrist says I should tell him how I feel 

He says, "oh great, I gotta listen to her snivel again" 

So I have these little unfulfilled fantasies 

Of putting arsenic in his teacup 

We'd see who'd be laughing then 

If only he was the type to drink tea 

Now I hear him come up the driveway 

In his el camino 

With it's black with a red-flame firebird on front 

He keeps the keys to himself 

He won't take me out to the movies 

Cause of football 

So I'll just hold out on something else 

I'll never cook him another single hungry man tv dinner again 

I say, "listen man, you better treat me with some 

R-e-s-p-e-c-t 

Cause I gotta a whole lotta what you need 

Then a whole lot besides, and then still a whole lot more" 

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He said, "yeah, if you were talking about your weight 

That might be true - but otherwise all you give me is 

Headache and heartburn" 

So I took his hungry man tv dinner and his sorrels 

So I took his left slipper and his hungry man tv dinner 

And I spit on his sorrels as I walked out the door. 

And I spit on him as I walked out the door 

By the way, your dog ralph won't be coming home again