Fruitcakes Lyrics - Buffett Live: Tuesdays, Thursdays, Saturdays - Jimmy Buffett

(Spoken:) 

"You know I was talking to my friend Desdemona the other day she 

runs this space station and bake shop down near Boomtown. She told 

me that human beings are flawed individuals. The cosmic bakers 

took us out of the oven a little too early. And that's the 

reason we're as crazy as we are and I believe it." 

"Take for example when you go to the movies these days, you know. 

They try to sell you this jumbo drink, 8 extra ounces of watered 

down cherry coke for an extra 25 cents. I don't want it. 

I don't want that much organziation in my life. 

I don't want other people thinking for me. 

I want my Junior Mints. Where did the Junior Mints go in the 

movies. I don't want a 12 lb. Nestle's crunch for 25 dollars. I 

WANT JUNIOR MINTS!" 

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"We need more fruitcakes in this world and less bakers! 

We need people that care! I'm mad as hell! And I don't want to 

take it anymore!" 

Chorus: 

Fruitcakes in the kitchen (Fruitcakes in the kitchen) 

Fruitcakes on the street (Fruitcakes on the street) 

Struttin' naked through the crosswalk 

In the middle of the week 

Half-baked cookies in the oven (Cookies in the oven) 

Half-baked people on the bus (People on the bus) 

There's a little bit of fruitcake left in everyone of us 

Paradise, lost and found 

Paradise, take a look around 

I was out in California where I hear they have it all 

They got riots, fires, mud slides 

They've got sushi in the mall 

Water bars, brontasaurs, chinese modern lust 

Shake and bake life with the quake 

The secret's in the crust 

Photos 

Chorus: 

Fruitcakes in the kitchen (Fruitcakes in the kitchen) 

Fruitcakes on the street (Fruitcakes on the street) 

Struttin' naked through the crosswalk 

In the middle of the week 

Half-baked cookies in the oven (Cookies in the oven) 

Half-baked people on the bus (People on the bus) 

There's a little bit of fruitcake left in everyone of us 

(Spoken:) 

"Speakin' of fruitcakes, how 'bout the government? 

Your tax dollars at work." 

We lost our Martian rocket ship 

The high paid spokesman said 

Looks like that silly rocket ship 

Has lost its cone shaped head 

We spent 90 jillion dollars trying to get a look at Mars 

I hear universal laughter ringing out among the stars 

Chorus: 

Fruitcakes in the galaxy (Fruitcakes in the galaxy) 

Fuitcakes on the earth (Fruitcakes on the earth) 

Struttin' naked towards eternity 

We've been that way since birth 

Half-baked cookies in the oven (Cookies in the oven) 

Half-baked people on the bus (People on the bus) 

There's a little bit of fruitcake left in everyone of us 

(Spoken:) 

"Religion! Religion! Oh, there's a thin line between Saturday 

night and Sunday morning. Here we go now. 

Alright, alter boys." 

Mea Culpa Mea Culpa Mea Maxima Culpa 

Mea Culpa Mea Culpa Mea Maxima Culpa 

Where's the church, who took the steeple 

Religion is in the hands of some crazy-ass people 

Television preachers with bad hair and dimples 

The god's honest truth is it's not that simple 

It's the Buddhist in you, it's the Pagan in me 

It's the Muslim in him, she's Catholic ain't she? 

It's the born again look its the WASP and the Jew 

Tell me what's goin on, I ain't gotta clue 

(Spoken:) 

"Now here comes the big ones. Relationships! We all got 'em, we 

all want 'em. What do we do with 'em? 

Here we go, I'll tell ya." 

She said you gotta do your fair share 

Now cough up half the rent 

I treat my body like a temple 

You treat yours like a tent 

But the right word at the right time 

May get me a little hug 

That's the difference between lightning 

And a harmless lightnin' bug 

Chorus: 

Fruitcakes in the kitchen (Fruitcakes in the kitchen) 

Fruitcakes on the street (Fruitcakes on the street) 

Struttin' naked through the crosswalk 

In the middle of the week 

Half-baked cookies in the oven (Cookies in the oven) 

Half-baked people on the bus (People on the bus) 

There's a little bit of fruitcake left in everyone of us 

(Spoken:) 

"The future. Captain's log, stardate two thousand and something." 

We're seven years from the millenium 

That's a science fiction fact 

Stanley Kubrick and his buddy HAL 

Now don't look that abstract 

So I'll put on my Bob Marley tape 

And practice what I preach 

Get Jah lost in the reggae mon 

As I walk along the beach 

Stay in touch with my insanity really is the only way 

Its a jungle out there kiddies 

Have a very fruitful day 

Hey. 

Chorus: 

Fruitcakes in the kitchen (Fruitcakes in the kitchen) 

Fruitcakes on the street (Fruitcakes on the street) 

Struttin' naked through the crosswalk 

In the middle of the week 

Half-baked cookies in the oven (Cookies in the oven) 

Half-baked people on the bus (People on the bus) 

There's a little bit of fruitcake left in everyone of us 

(Spoken:) 

"That's right, you too. Yeah those crumbs are spread all around 

this universe. I've seen fruitcakes. I saw this guy in Santa 

Monica rollerskate naked through the crosswalk. Down in New 

Orleans in the French market there are fruitcakes like you cannot 

believe. New York, forget it. Fruitcake city. Down island, we've got 

fruitcakes. Spread them crumbs around. That's right, we want 

'em around. Keep bakin' baby. Keep bakin'."