Step Right Up Lyrics - Used Songs (1973-1980) - Tom Waits

Step right up 

Step right up 

Step right up 

everyone's a winner 

bargains galore 

that's right you too can be the proud owner of 

the quality goes in before the name goes on 

one tenth of a dollar 

one tenth of a dollar 

we got service after the sale 

how 'bout perfume 

we got perfume 

how 'bout an engagement ring 

somethin for the little lady 

somethin for the little lady 

somethin for the little lady 

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3 for a dollar 

We got a year end clearance 

we got our white sale on a smoke damaged furniture 

you can drive it away today. 

act now 

act now 

and receive as our gift 

our gift to you 

they come in all colors 

one size fits all 

no muss, no fuss, no spills 

you tired of kitchen drudgery 

everything must go 

goin outta biz 

goin outta biz 

goin outta bizness sale 

Photos 

50% off original retail price 

skip the middle man 

dont settle for less 

how do we do it 

how do we do it 

volume! volume! 

turn up the volume! 

you've heard it advertised 

don't hesitate 

don't be caught with your drawers down 

don't be caught with your drawers down 

you just step right up 

step right up 

that's right it fillets 

it chops, it dices, it slices 

it never stops 

lasts a lifetime, it mows your lawn 

and it mows your lawn 

it picks up the kids from school 

it gets rid of unwanted facial hair 

it gets rid of embarassing age spots 

it delivers the pizza 

and it lengthens 

and it strengthens 

and it finds that slipper that's be enlodged under the 

chaise lounge for several weeks 

and it plays a mean rhythm master 

it makes excuses for unwanted lipstick on your collar 

and it's only a dollar 

step right up 

it's only a dollar 

step right up 

'cause it forges your signature 

if not completely satisfied 

mail back unused portion of product for a complete refund of price of purchase 

step right up 

please allow thirty days for delivery 

don't be fooled by cheap imitations 

you can 

live in it 

live in it 

laugh in it 

love in it 

swim in it 

sleep in it 

live in it 

swim in it 

laugh in it 

love in it 

and it removes embarassing stains from contour sheets 

that's right 

and it entertains visiting relatives 

it turns a sandwich into a banquet 

tired of being the life of the party 

change your shorts 

change your life 

change your life 

change into a 9 year old hindu boy 

get rid of your wife 

and it walks your dog 

and it doubles on sax 

doubles on sax 

you can jump back jack 

see ya later alligator 

see ya later alligator 

and it steals your car 

it gets rid of your gambling debts 

it quits smoking 

it's a friend, it's a companion 

it's the only product you will ever need 

follow these easy assembly instructions 

it never needs ironing 

well it takes weights off hips 

bust 

thighs 

chin 

midriff 

gives you dandruff 

and it finds you a job 

it is a job 

and it strips the phone company 

of free tapes and your while exchange 

and it gives you denture breath 

and you know it's a friend 

and it's a companion 

and it gets rid of your travellers checks 

it's new, it's improved, it's old fashioned 

well it takes care of business 

never needs winding 

never needs winding 

never needs winding 

gets rid of blackheads, heartbreak, and psoriasis 

Christ, you don't know the meaning of heartbreak buddy 

c'mon, c'mon. 

c'mon, c'mon. 

cause it's effective 

it's defective 

it creates household odors 

it disinfects 

it's sanitized for your protection 

it gives you an erection 

it wins the election 

why put up with painful corns any longer 

it's a redeemable coupon 

no obligation 

no salesman will visit your home 

we got a jackpot 

jackpot 

jackpot 

prizes! Prizes! Prizes! 

All work guaranteed 

how do we do it? 

how do we do it? 

how do we do it? 

how do we do it? 

we need your bidness 

We're going out of business 

we'll give you the business 

get on the business end of our 

going out of business sale 

Receive our free brochure 

free brochure 

read the easy to follow assembly instructions 

batteries not included 

send before midnight tomorrow 

terms available 

step right up 

step right up 

step right up 

you got it buddy 

the large print giveth 

and the small print taketh away 

step right up 

you can step right up 

cause you can step right up 

c'mon step right up 

get away from me kid, ya bother me 

step right up 

step right up 

step right up 

c'mon c'mon c'mon 

c'mon c'mon 

step right up 

you can step right up 

c'mon and step right up 

c'mon step right up