Searching For Salinger Searchers Lyrics - Vital Organ Auction

I will never forget the night that J.D. Salinger 

pasted his face to my bedroom window 

and demanded to know all my thoughts 

about every work of his I'd ever read 

He told me that I owed him as a fan 

because I'd powerfully shared publicly 

my affection for the precision of his dialog 

and the innovation of his short stories 

I tried to explain to the maniac that I said 

all there was to say in that one declaration 

But he said that he knew there was more 

and he wouldn't stop until I helped him feed 

the ravenous wolf packs that I unleashed 

inside him with the kindness of my insights 

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And he kept showing up 

So I kept calling the cops 

Salinger's outside my house again 

Salinger's outside my office again 

He thinks he's Spider-Man again, 

crawling all over my timeshare condo 

Why can't authors embrace our privacy 

the way they instigate these imbroglios? 

I decided to build a barrier around my home 

but Salinger remained relentless with me 

He'd follow me to Burger King and ask 

how I could possibly enjoy the Whopper 

when I claimed I hated society 

As he continued to steal my French fries, 

I asked him where he got his information 

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He told me that biographers and filmmakers 

wanted to feature a fan for the planet 

and they'd been dishing my dirt to him 

I responded that they'd never spoken 

to me or to anyone from my inner circle, 

adding that he better leave BK soon 

and slapped his hand off my milkshake 

But he kept showing up 

So I kept calling the cops 

Salinger's outside KFC again 

Salinger's outside Arby's again 

He's dressed as Ronald McDonald again, 

thinking disguises can hide his intentions 

You should see him run in those red shoes 

when security arrives for clown intervention 

''Well lucky me'' or so I thought after I died, 

thinking that he couldn't bug me now 

But he stalked my plot on night one, 

bellowing for my bones to rise again 

I could see flower foundations collapsing 

as he stomped them because I left him 

He announced he was there with colleagues 

who enjoy graveyard invasions like he does 

Closing my eyes tighter than death's usual drape, 

I hoped their obsession wouldn't go this far 

but dirt began to fly and I couldn't get away 

Clicking cameras and video recorders descended 

alongside Salinger who reached out for me, 

shook my body, and yelled ''Hello!'' 

Salinger says he'll get answers from my family 

He says that he'll get them from my friends 

He says he'll approach my former neighbors 

I can hear wolves howling between our bodies 

and I wonder if two skeletons must disintegrate 

before J.D. and I will finally rest in peace