The Uss Make Shit Up Lyrics - Voltaire

I was stranded on a planet, Just me and Spock 

We met a nasty nazi alien who locked our asses up 

We found a hunk of crystal and a metal piece of bed 

We made a laser phaser gun and shot him in the head 

Bust a move, Doc 

I was standing on the bridge when Sulu came to me 

His eyes were full of tears he said "Captain, can't you see 

the ship is gonna blow do something I beseech" 

I grabbed a tribble and some chewing gum and stopped the warp core breach 

And I say, 

Bounce a graviton particle beam off the main deflector dish 

Thats the way we do things, lad, we're making shit up as we wish 

The Klingons and the Romulans pose no threat to us 

'Cause if we find we're in a bind we just make some shit up 

And though he's just a child, and some think him a twit 

Wesley is the master when it comes to making up some shit 

He's the guy you want with you when you go out in space 

Now if only he could beam those pimples off his face 

And if you're at a party on the starship Enterprise 

And the karaoke player just plain old up and dies 

Set up a neutrino field inside a can of peas 

Hold on to Geordi's visor and sing into Data's knee 

And I say 

Bounce a graviton particle beam off the main deflector dish 

Thats the way we do things lad, we're making shit up as we wish 

The Klingons and the Romulans pose no threat to us 

'Cause if we find we're in a bind we just make some shit up 

Sisko's on a mission to go no bloody place 

He loiters on a space station above Bajoran space 

The wormhole's opened up and now they come from near and far 

We'll keep the booze but please send back the fucking Jem'hadar 

What is with the Klingons, remember in the day 

They looked like Puerto Ricans and they dressed in gold lame 

Now they look like heavy metal rockers from the dead 

With leather pants and frizzy hair and lobsters on their heads 

And I say 

Bounce a graviton particle beam off the main deflector dish 

Thats the way we do things lad, we're making shit up as we wish 

The Klingons and the Romulans pose no threat to us 

'Cause if we find we're in a bind we just make some shit up 

Well, I was stuck on Voyager, pounding on the door 

When suddently it dawned on me I've seen this show before 

Perhaps I'm in a warp bubble and slightly out of phase 

'Cause it was way back in the sixties when they called it "Lost in Space" 

We were looking for a way to make the ratings soar 

So we orchestrated an encounter with the Borg 

Normally you'd think that that would get us into shit 

But this one has a smashing ass and a lovely set of tits 

And I say 

Bounce a graviton particle beam off the main deflector dish 

Thats the way we do things lad, we're making shit up as we wish 

The Klingons and the Romulans pose no threat to us 

'Cause if we find we're in a bind we're totally screwed but nevermind 

We'll pull something out of our behinds, we just make some shit up