I Can't Watch This Lyrics - The Tv Album - Weird Al Yankovic

I can't watch this. I can't watch this 

I can't watch this. I can't watch this 

My my my my TV makes me so bored 

Makes me say, oh my lord 

What is this garbage here? 

Wanna cover my eyes and plug my ears 

It sucks, and that's no lie 

It's about as much fun as watching paint dry 

Lowers my IQ one notch 

And that's the reason why, uh, I can't watch 

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I told you homeboy... I can't watch this 

Yeah, nothin' but trash and you know... I can't watch this 

Poke out my eyes, man... I can't watch this 

Yo, gimme that remote control... I can't watch this 

Talkin' 'bout sick shows 

There's America's Funniest Home Videos 

I can't believe my eyes 

When I see the kind of stuff that wins first prize 

Somebody's poor old mom 

Falls down off the roof, lands right on the lawn 

Face first on a rake 

I hear they've got it on the seventeenth take 

That's funny as a kick in the crotch 

And that kind of show, uh, I can't watch 

Yo, I told you... I can't watch this 

Change the channel now, man... I can't watch this 

Yo, pass the TV Guide here, sucker... I can't watch this 

Photos 

Cosby Show and Roseanne 

Think I've taken 'bout as much as I can 

Judge Wapner, oh my 

You gotta be Rain Man to like this guy 

Thirtysomething is alright 

If you like hearing yuppies whining all night 

Can't stand Twin Peaks 

Wish they'd lynch those doughnut-eatin' freaks 

Those Siskel & Ebert bums 

Oughta go home and sit on their thumbs 

That's word because you know... I can't watch this 

I can't watch this 

Break it down! 

Here's-how-to-order-money-back-guarantee-removes-tough-stains-fast-it-tastes- 

more-like-fresh-peanuts-they-keep-going-and-going-don't-hate-me-because-I'm- 

beautiful-could-be-dandruff-our-prices-are-insaaaane!!! 

Stop! Prime Time! 

I'm pretty sure I'll be sick 

If I have to watch another stupid pet trick 

Or that guy with the real flat hair 

That goes "woof woof woof" and waves his fist in the air 

Or those weird talk shows 

About Transsexual Nazi Eskimos 

They're rude, crude and vile 

Just for a minute let's flip down the dial 

Flip, flip, flip... yeccch, I can't watch this 

Look man... I can't watch this 

I can't take this torture no more, I can't... 

I can't watch this 

Pay the bills, station break 

Break it down! 

Operators-are-standing-by-cubic-zirconium-necklace-you're-soaking-in-it-and-our 

-fabulous-swimsuit-issue-when-you've-got-a-headache-this-big-read-the-book-this 

-is-your-brain-on-drugs-I've-fallen-and-I-can't-get-up!! 

Stop! Cable Time! 

HBO and Playboy, Showtime and MTV 

I might like 'em more after my lobotomy 

Now why did I ever pay for this junk? 

I hooked up eighty channels and each one stunk 

Just brainless blood and guts, and mindless T & A 

It's awful, it's putrid, it's crummy, it's stupid, gonna throw my set away 

I can't watch this. I can't watch this 

I can't watch this. Yeah... I can't watch this 

I told you... can't watch this 

Too hip, can't watch this 

Get me outta here... can't watch this