The Do Wop Lyrics - Bigger & Deffer - Ll Cool J

L.L. Cool J 

Serving 'em well 

And as you all know 

I am hard as hell 

Woke up at 9:30 on a Saturday morn' 

Hemmed my remote control, turned my stereo on 

Then I reached for a brush since I don't use the picks 

And the floor was kinda cold so I put on my kicks 

Walked to the kitchen and ate some cornflakes 

As I bop to a tape of Cut Creator's breaks 

With hardcore, heavyweight, b-boy blast 

Connoisseur of hardcore and Cut Creator's fast 

Jumped in the shower, it was boiling hot 

So I stayed there a hour 'cause I like it a lot 

Jumped out, dried off, put on the Denim cologne 

Then I called up Earl on the telephone 

He told me 'bout a jam that I could do later on 

10 g's plus a Limo for one strong song 

So I said, yeah, I was with it, hung up and got geared 

Got a magnifying glass then I brushed my beard 

Rewound some tapes of some Def Jam tunes 

As I waited for this freak to ring my bell at noon 

12 o'clock came, left the door crack 

The freak walked in a mink on her back 

Put her curt on the rack, threw my [Incomprehensible] on 

Then I threw in a tape of the quiet storm 

We drank Roundhill Cavern, ate soft mignons 

She said, "L.L., when you're gonna let me taste your tongue?" 

My skin got pale, I wam-bammed the tail 

Did it so hard I shoulda went to jail 

She left, Earl came over and we went outside 

Jumped in the BM to bust a joyride 

Went up to A.J. in my fresh black wheel 

I'm not a sucker on the corner trying to scrape up a meal 

The girlies want sex, the fellas try to plex 

But those who flex end up with broke necks 

Signed some autographs for a posse of freaks 

Said, "It's L, baby, I ain't down with Chic" 

We conversated with the skeezers for 10 minutes more 

Then I jumped in my ride and the freaks slammed the door 

Due 'cause I'm a gangster people think I do crimes 

They don't know I'm just a connoisseur of hip-hop rhymes 

Some smile, try to call L.L. a hoodlum at times 

But he don't know my autograph's on his wife's behind 

L.L. has iced all the washed up slobs 

Vigilante of rap so to hell with the mob 

Don't run from the cops, making suckers jock 

And I'm only 18 making more than your pops 

Tormentor of toys and boyscout boys 

And I dare any critic to call it noise 

Peeped at the clock, it said 6:03 

Said later to Creator and broke out with E 

Went up to White Castle for a chocolate shake 

Thinking 'bout a 100'000 that I'd soon make 

Finished up the snack, jumped up, out my seat 

E-Love hit the table and he made up a beat 

Kicked a few lines, stepped out the door 

Since tonight is a bore I'm in the mood for more 

We jumped in my ride, I took a peek at the time 

It was almost 7:30 and the show was at nine 

L.L. Cool J will soon stand at a jam 

With thousands of people screaming, "Touch my hand" 

But since I had a hour plus a half for tat 

I was searching for the cutie who's my perfect match 

Her name was Renee, her face was okay 

But she had the kinda body that made Jay wanna play 

I said, "No need to rehearse", then I made my approach 

Said, "You got a good team, girl but you need a new coach" 

Said, "My name's L.L.Cool, if I may introduce 

But I'm not here for conversation, I'm here to seduce 

Wanna mix it up baby, wanna feel you grind 

'Cause it ain't 5th grade and these ain't nursery rhymes" 

"And I know that you adore my sure side hardcore 

Check out the real L.L. behind closed doors 

So tell your buddies you're busy, tell your boyfriend beat it 

Forget the silk dress 'cause you ain't gonna need it" 

"Unplug your clock, do away with the light 

After five minutes or more you hear me say, that's right 

Your body is bad and I heard you got a Caddy 

When we make love you can call me daddy" 

"I'm L.L. Cool J, say hey, Renee 

I'm not a toyboy but I still wanna play 

Promise you, I'm not wack when I'm in the sack 

After that I leave you starving for me to come back" 

"But in the meantime, put your digits down 

And the next time I see ya I'm going to town" 

Stepped away from the freak, it was a quarter to nine 

When I rolled to the jam I saw the crew on line 

Took a trip around the side, so I could get backstage 

If you call me a tiger, then the stage is my cage 

I rip, stomp and crush, heavy metal bands rust 

Them flaky knuckleheads I crumble up like crust 

Walked in my dressing room and then I heard four knocks 

They said, "L.L., you're running late and it's time to rock" 

Told Cut Creator what the order would be 

Then I said "Lord have mercy" and slapped hands with E 

Went onstage, I heard the girlies scream 

And that's the very moment I woke up from the dream