On The First Day Of Christmas

On a first day of Christmas. My true love gave to me. Clap and I left her.

Oh Holy Crap

Oh holy crap, I think I got a flat tyre. I'm in the middle of a Puerto Rican neighborhood.

Don't Make Me Wait [extended Version]

Ode To Titties

On the first night in the titty club,. We was checking out all the chicks.. There was black ones and whites ones, brunettes and blondes,. Look at the size of that red heads tits..

O Little Girl From Birmingham

Carried Away [larry Levan Remix]

No Hair - Just A Red Head

I always get really irritated when you go out to eat, and stuff, you know. I took this girl out to eat a while back, we had a nice place. I rolled the window up and the tray fell off, and, uh, she's like, "You got mustard on my jacket!".

Looking Good At The Flea Market

You ever go to a drive-in movie, start drinking, get drunk, pass out in your car, and the next morning you're part of flea market?. Then you feel bad, you ain't got nothing to sell up there, you know. All the Mexicans are mad at you, you know. They running around up there..

Bad For Me [remastered 12

I Wish My Mother-in-law'd Get Hit By A Car

I wish my mother-in-law'd get hit by a car. I wish my mother-in-law'd get hit by a car. I wish my mother-in-law'd get hit by a car. So I wouldn't have to, drinkin' bitch.

I Shit My Pants

I Pissed My Pants

I pissed in my pants, the toilet was just to far. I drunk too much damn beer. I tried to hold it in but my bladder just gave in. And I pissed right through my drawers.

I Made The Bigg Times Now

Thank you!. Appreciate it!. Git-R-Done! But it's good to be here, I tell you.. When I come in here this evening and see my name out front in magic marker, boy I tell you what. Daggone..

Hilary Clinton's Coming To Town

You better watch out,. I think she's a guy,. I'm not quite sure,. But somethin ain't right.... Hilary Clinton's Coming to town.

Hark, The Hairlip Angel Sing

Hark, the harlip angel sing. (slurred) Glory to the newborn king.

Grandpa's Thanksgiving Story

This is the story of the first Thanksgiving, once again by my drunk grandpa:. . Many years ago...Christopher Columbus and his pilgrim buddies come to America on a boat called the Mayflower to live because the English King wouldn't let the Jewish people go..

Get A Job

Get a Job. You Bum Bum Bum Bum Bum. Money don't grow on trees. You Bum Bum Bum Bum Bum.

Donny The Retard

Donny the Retard. had a 8 pound water head. he was 5 foot 3. and he said to me. "i like tater tots".. . "i like tater tots". . may be changed to. . "my name's Donny".

Vasectomy Song

I went to see my doctor, I said Doc I can't pay my bills. The rent's all spent, the truck's got a dent. And I think I'm getting the chills. From being forced to sleep alone.

Do You Hear What I Hear

Get a job you bum bum bum. Money dont grow on trees you bum bum bum.. . Silent farts. Deadly farts. All was calm. Not fer long. . Oh come on illegal foreigners.